I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
