id be glad to
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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