Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
