Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
She's just so happy...and so naked.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
