I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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