I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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