Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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