When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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