We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
