My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
he told me I talked like a deaf person
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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