This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
