It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
