ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
