Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
