your thong is hanging out like whoa
Your mouth is God's brothel.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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