I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
