shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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