I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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