and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I just want to make out with him forever
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
