Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
