i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
