next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Hippo gnu deer
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
