I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
