dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
