I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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