If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Drunk is not a location!
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Randomize
