I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
