i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
