I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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