So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
