Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I intend to get homeless drunk
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Drunk is a universal language darling
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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