ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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