omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Randomize
