Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
