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can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
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