he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
