just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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