What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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