The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize