You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Randomize
