8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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