why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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