If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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