How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
