Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
