I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
