U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
