I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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