then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
