No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
