Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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